    The Project Gutenberg EBook of Cartoons by McCutcheon, by John T. McCutcheon

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    Title: Cartoons by McCutcheon
           A selection of one hundred drawings

    Author: John T. McCutcheon

    Release Date: August 9, 2020 [EBook #62895]

    Language: English

    Character set encoding: UTF-8

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{1}

CARTOONS
BY
McCUTCHEON

{2}

{3}

# CARTOONS
B Y
McCUTCHEON

A Selection of One Hundred Drawings
By JOHN T. McCUTCHEON
INCLUDING THE FAMOUS “BOY IN SPRINGTIME” SERIES, ETC.
CHICAGO
A. C. McCLURG & CO
1904

{4}

Copyright
By A. C. McClurg & Co.
1903
——
Published May 2, 1903
Second Edition, May 20, 1903
Third Edition, June 20, 1903
Fourth Edition, July 15, 1903
Fifth Edition, January 1, 1904
The cartoons in this volume originally appeared in “The Chicago
Record-Herald,” and they are now reprinted through the courtesy
of the publisher of that paper, Mr. Frank B. Noyes.
UNIVERSITY PRESS · JOHN WILSON
AND SON · CAMBRIDGE, U. S. A.
{5}

## CONCERNING
MR. McCUTCHEON’S CARTOONS

THOSE who have studied and admired Mr. McCutcheon’s cartoons in the daily press doubtless have been favorably impressed by the two eminent characteristics of his intent. First, he cartoons public men without grossly insulting them. Second, he recognizes the very large and important fact that political events do not fill the entire horizon of the American people. It has not been very many years since the newspaper cartoon was a savage caricature of some public man who had been guilty of entertaining tariff opinions that did not agree with the tariff opinions of the man who controlled the newspaper. It was supposed to supplement the efforts of the editorial in which the leaders of the opposition were termed “reptiles.”

¶ The first-class, modern newspaper seems to have awakened to the fact that our mundane existence is not entirely wrapped up in politics. Also, that a man may disagree with us and still have some of the attributes of humanity.

¶ In Mr. McCutcheon’s cartoons we admire the clever execution, and the gentle humor which diffuses all of his work, but I dare say that more than all we admire him for his considerate treatment of public men and his blessed wisdom in getting away from the hackneyed political subjects and giving us a few pictures of that every-day life which is our real interest.

George Ade

Chicago, March 1, 1903.{7}{6}

## A BOY IN SPRINGTIME

“Dog gone it! I wish they hadn’t found her till after the baseball season.{9}{8}”

## A BOY IN SPRINGTIME

“Aw, that’s easy. I can do lots harder ones than that.{11}{10}”

## A BOY IN SPRINGTIME

“Sunday Clothes{13}{12}”

## A BOY IN SPRINGTIME

“Dog gone the luck, anyway.{15}{14}”

## A BOY IN SPRINGTIME

The Last Day of School

{17}{16}

## THE FRENCH EMISSARY STUDIES OUR INDUSTRIAL METHODS

Up-to-Date Architecture

{19}{18}

## THE FRENCH EMISSARY STUDIES OUR INDUSTRIAL METHODS

The Enterprising Daily Paper

{21}{20}

## THE FRENCH EMISSARY STUDIES OUR INDUSTRIAL METHODS

The Stock Yards

{23}{22}

## THE FRENCH EMISSARY STUDIES OUR INDUSTRIAL METHODS

The Board of Trade

{25}{24}

## THE COLISEUM HORSE SHOW

{27}{26}

## AT LAST WE ARE TO HAVE FOX HUNTING NEAR CHICAGO

{29}{28}

## A SUNDAY TROLLEY TRIP ALONG THE NORTH SHORE

{31}{30}

## SUNDAY IN LINCOLN PARK

{33}{32}

## DERBY DAY

{35}{34}

## THE LAKE FOREST HORSE SHOW

{37}{36}

## THE WOMEN’S GOLF TOURNAMENT

{39}{38}

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

The Pirate Chieftain—“We’re Surrounded by perils. Behind Us is a Herd of Wild Buffaloes, on One Side Is an Unfriendly Shore Swarming with Hostile Natives, and in Front of Us Are Breakers and Deadly Reptiles.{41}{40}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“See, I ain’t afraid.{43}{42}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

The Blowing-up of Penelope

{45}{44}

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“For the land’s sake, child, where do you put all the stuff you eat? This is the fourth piece you’ve had since breakfast.{47}{46}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“Come and look at your new sister, Johnny.{49}{48}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“I wonder if she likes him better than she does me.{51}{50}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“The Voice of the Tempter{53}{52}”

## A BOY IN SUMMER-TIME

“Suddently Attackted” by Serious Illness on the First Morning of School

{55}{54}

## THE VACATION SEASON

{57}{56}

## READING THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE

{59}{58}

## CIRCUS DAY

{61}{60}

## THE DINNER-HORN AT HARVEST-TIME

{63}{62}

## THE COUNTY FAIR

{65}{64}

## THE OPENING DAY OF THE COLLEGES

{67}{66}

## THE COLLEGES ARE NOW IN FULL BLAST

{69}{68}

## THE FOOTBALL SEASON IS HERE

{71}{70}

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

“’Cept Spring and Summer, I like Fall the best of all.{73}{72}”

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

“Recess{75}{74}”

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

“Little Brother visits the School{77}{76}”

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

“Poor little fellow, I’m afraid he’s a pretty sick little dog.{79}{78}”

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

The Burial of Kafoozalum

{81}{80}

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

“Go ahead, Bill, you’re braver than I am. We’ll just pertend we’re pirates and the crulls is a ship filled with gold and joolry.{83}{82}”

## A BOY IN FALL-TIME

Three Days before Thanksgiving—“I believe I’ll just pertend it’s Thanksgiving already.{85}{84}”

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

A Little Exhibition of Democratic Simplicity at a New York Luncheon

{87}{86}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Ten Minutes in St. Louis

{89}{88}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Puzzle—“Whom are they expecting?{91}{90}”

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

A Costume Event at the Auditorium, illustrating Life in the Wild West

{93}{92}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Milwaukee

{95}{94}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Niagara Falls

{97}{96}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Boston

{99}{98}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

Boston

{101}{100}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

An Afternoon Tea in New York

{103}{102}

## ENTERTAINING PRINCE HENRY

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I thank you for a very Pleasant Visit{105}{104}”

## PRESIDENT ROOSEVELT IS RESTING AT OYSTER BAY

First he chops down a few trees. |  | Then takes a cross-country canter.

Then takes a cross-country canter. |  | After which he gives the children a wheel-barrow ride.

He then rests for a moment. |  | By which time he is ready for breakfast.

{107}{106}

## OUR PRESIDENT ENTERTAINS SOME OF HIS FRIENDS AT OYSTER BAY

He first entertains an old fellow tennis-player. |  | And then shows a few fellow rough riders around town.

After which he is visited by some fellow LL.D.’s. |  | And then a couple of old hunter friends.

A few fellow politicians then call to discuss the situation. |  | And finally he has a pleasant chat with some fellow authors and historians.

{109}{108}

## PRESIDENT ROOSEVELT VISITS MR. CLEVELAND AT PRINCETON

“Ah! Welcome to Princeton, Mr. Roosevelt.”

“Would you like to look at my photograph albums?”

“That one weighed eight pounds, Theodore.{111}{110}”

## BEAR HUNTING IN MIASMA, MISSISSIPPI

“Now, you jest be patient, Mr. President, and ye’ll soon have a nice mess o’ bar.”

(Four hours later.) “I wonder where the bears are to-day. This is unbearable.”

(Eight hours later.) “Strange there wa’n’t none o’ them bar around. Reckon you all wa’n’t patient enough, Mr. President.{113}{112}”

## CAMPAIGNING WITH BATHHOUSE JOHN

The Poet Candidate Gives an Author’s Reading before Literary Circles in the Lodging-House District

{115}{114}

## CAMPAIGNING WITH BATHHOUSE JOHN

Courier from the Front—“They’ve routed the ‘Old Guard,’ General!{117}{116}”

## OUR CHICAGO ALDERMEN IN NEW YORK

“Ah, gents, permit us to show you our beautiful city.”

“Now, gents, step right up and try to pick out the little joker.”

“Great Scott, Shorty, who wass them guys, anyway?{119}{118}”

## OUR CHICAGO ALDERMEN IN BOSTON

“Ah, gentlemen, you are interested in literature, are you not?”

“Why, sure.”

“How is the literary movement in the West, gentlemen?”

“Fine. Moving right along in great shape.”

“I suppose you enjoy Emerson, gentlemen?”

“Why, yes, I suppose so. What paper’s he on now?”

“And do you not love Holmes, the dear old Autocrat of the Breakfast Table?”

“You bet! There’s nobody like Sherlock for a good, rattling detective story.{121}{120}”

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

“Look, Ma! See how much wood we carried in, and you didn’t haf to ask us to, either. And we watered the plants, too.{123}{122}”

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

A Letter to Santy

{125}{124}

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

“Well, how lovely for you to come over to visit your Aunt Mary! And you’re just in time for dinner, too. Isn’t that nice? Did you tell your mother that you were going visiting?{127}{126}”

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

“Come on! Hurry up, fellers! The hounds have found the trail!{129}{128}”

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

The Fairy Story—“Once upon a time there was a very beautiful little fairy princess—{131}{130}”

## A BOY IN WINTER-TIME

“I bet yer glad to be out again, haint you, Johnny?{133}{132}”

## MR. MORGAN VISITS KING EDWARD

{135}{134}

## KING EDWARD MEETS MR. MORGAN

“Good-evening, Your Majesty.” “Good-evening, Mr. Morgan.” |  | “You look well in your knickers, Morgan.” “I came on my bike, King Edward.”

“Your crown becomes you very much, King.” “I’m afraid it needs pressing, Pierpont.” |  | “Have a fresh cigar, Pierp.” “Thanks, Edward. It looks like a good one.”

“Let me reciprocate, Ed. Have a bunch of stocks on me.” “Thanks. Don’t care if I do.” |  | And then Pierpont settled down to business.

{137}{136}

## MR. MORGAN MEETS THE KAISER

“I hope you like my original painting, Mr. Morgan?”

“Very clever, Your Majesty.”

“I hope you enjoy my original musical composition, Mr. Morgan?”

“It’s very clever.”

“My original poetry interests you, I trust?”

“What’s that about ‘trust’? Ah, now you interest me, Your Majesty.{139}{138}”

## PRESIDENT ROOSEVELT DELIVERS AN ADDRESS TO THE TRUST MAGNATES

President Roosevelt—“We must regulate the bad trusts, and—

“Perhaps revise the tariff on articles that are sold cheaper abroad than at home.{141}{140}”

## THE SPEAKER THAT SPOKE AT THE WRONG TIME

“Sh! Do not speak, or else you’ll wake the tariff.”

And just then Speaker Henderson came along.

{143}{142}

## SOCIAL HAPPENINGS AT BIRD CENTER, ILLINOIS

A Reception in the K. of P. Hall in Honor of the Hon. Ephraim Pumphrey, Congressman-Elect

“Among those present were Mrs. Riley Withersby, widow of the late Riley Withersby; Rev. Walpole and wife and children, Dr. Crosby Niebling and wife, Judge Horatio S. Warden, Mr. Smiley W. Greene, the popular undertaker, and wife and children; Captain Roscoe Fry and wife and children, Mine Host, ‘Mort’ Peters, of the Bird Center House, and wife; Attorney D. I. Black and wife and children, Messrs. Winthrop K. Biddle, of Philadelphia, Elmer Pratt, Homer Withersby, Orville Peters, Riley W. Peters, Wilbur Fry, and ‘ye editor,’ J. Oscar Fisher; Misses Flossye Niebling, —— Barnard, of Xenia, Ohio; Lucile Ramona Fry, Grace Niebling, Kate Warden, who is home for the Thanksgiving vacation; Mae Niebling, Myrtle Peters, Elizabeth Nicklefield, Anna Walpole, Clara Black, and Alys Fry. Chris C. Newbower was also among those present.{145}{144}”

## SOCIAL HAPPENINGS AT BIRD CENTER, ILLINOIS

Mrs. Riley Withersby entertains the Bird Center Reading Circle

“A delightful affair was that given last evening at the pleasant residence of Mrs. Riley Withersby. It was the monthly meeting of the Bird Center Reading Circle and was an unusually successful and happy function. Among those present were Mrs. Riley Withersby, Rev. Walpole and wife and children, Mr. Smiley W. Greene, the popular undertaker, and wife and children, Mine Host, ‘Mort’ Peters, of the Bird Center House, and wife and children, Messrs. Elmer Pratt, Homer Withersby, Orville Peters, Riley W. Peters, Wilbur Fry, and ye editor, J. Oscar Fisher, Misses Lucile Ramona Fry, Grace Niebling, Kate Warden, Mae Niebling, Myrtle Peters, Anna Walpole, Clara Black, and others. Chris C. Newbower was also present for a while.{147}{146}”

## SOCIAL HAPPENINGS AT BIRD CENTER, ILLINOIS

Mrs. Smiley W. Greene, Wife of the Popular Undertaker, celebrates Thanksgiving by entertaining the Dancing Club

The Dancing Club met at the home of Mrs. Smiley W. Greene on Thanksgiving evening. A full quota of our fellow townsmen attended and all agreed on parting that a most enjoyable time was had. Mrs. Greene was beautifully gowned in a blue and white creation trimmed with sprays of immortelles. Elegant refreshments were served and the occasion was rendered quite Bohemian in character by the presence of our talented local artist, E. Milton Brown of the Bird Center Tintype Studios. Rev. Walpole and family dropped in for a few moments during the early part of the festivities.

ADDITIONAL SOCIETY NOTES.

Chris C. Newbower was also among those present at Mrs. Smiley W. Greene’s dancing club entertainment. Chris says that he is not much of a shining light in the social whirl.

Miss —— Barnard, of Xenia, Ohio, who has been visiting the Misses Niebling, has decided to remain here a week longer. Ah, there, R——y P——s.

## THE WAR MANŒUVRES, THE GALLANT GENERALS, AND THE ARMY MULES WHO DID NOT KNOW THAT IT WAS ALL IN FUN

Shortly after luncheon the enemy’s fleet was sighted stealthily approaching by sea.

Whereupon a terrific battle occurred which lasted two hours; and the fleet, being sunk, annihilated, and blown to atoms (constructively),

Departed, leaving the army victorious, with but two constructive casualties.

Every battery at the fort was worked with terrific effect.

{151}{150}

## THE NAVAL MANŒUVRES AT NEWPORT

“The enemy’s fleet has been sighted off the starboard quarter, sir.”

“Call all hands to quarters! Clear ship for action!”

“This reminds me of Santiago.”

“The Duchess of Marlborough is alongside in her dinghy, sir.”

“Pass the word to cease firing, and have Her Grace come aboard.”

“Ah, delighted, Your Grace. I hope this noise hasn’t annoyed you.{153}{152}”

## DECORATION DAY

“Don’t cry, Grandma. You’ll see him again sometime.{155}{154}”

## THE INGLORIOUS FIFTH

{157}{156}

## JUST BEFORE THANKSGIVING DAY

“Helping Mother{159}{158}”

## JUST BEFORE CHRISTMAS

“Ah, I see quite a number of new faces here to-day.{161}{160}”

## HAVE YOU EVER HAD THIS EXPERIENCE?

Mr. Manshopper—“I’ve discovered the great secret of Christmas present buying. First decide positively what you want to buy, then decide on the price you want to pay, and then go and buy it.”

“I think I like that bowl better than the vase or the inkstand.”

Chorus of Admiring Feminine Voices—“Oh, isn’t that a perfectly lovely pitcher! Oh, isn’t it too lovely for anything!”

Mr. Manshopper after having purchased a present for his wife’s writing desk.

{163}{162}

## A PICTORIAL SERMONETTE

The Woman who tells her Husband all her Petty Troubles

{164}

“I tell you, it’s a relief to get home after a long, hard day of work and worry at the office.”

“Oh, William, I’ve had such a dreadful day to-day! First it was one thing and then another. I just know the grocer overcharged me on that yeast I bought yesterday; and the baby cried nearly an hour this afternoon, and the bread burned, and the dog chewed up one of your slippers, and the roof leaks, and the hall carpet is wearing out.”

“And you must punish Willie. I can’t do a thing with him any more. He insists on being a pirate when he grows up, and he knows well enough that we want him to be a doctor. And we really must have a new hall carpet, and you must see about the roof, and be sure to see the grocer about the yeast.”

“Great Scott! I guess I’ll have to go down to the office again to-night.” {165}

## A PICTORIAL SERMONETTE

“Half-past four—and Johnny not here yet. I wonder what can keep him so long?”

“Supposing he has been skating and has broken through the ice!”

“Or maybe he has been run over by a trolley car!”

“Oh, I know something dreadful has happened to him. I just know they’ll soon be bringing him home.”

But, as usual, there was nothing whatever the matter with Johnny.

{167}{166}

## A PICTORIAL SERMONETTE

The Man who had no Right to Talk

At Eight O’Clock—“Why, take a night like this, with the thermometer below zero, the suffering among the poor is simply terrible. Somebody ought to take them coal barons out and string ’em up to the nearest lamp-post.”

At Eleven O’Clock—“I tell you, gentlemen, it’s an infamous outrage. Just think of the suffering among the helpless poor. It makes me mad to think of it. I wish I was President for about fifteen minutes—you’d see some of them villains in the coal trust pay for their confounded heartlessness.”

At Twelve O’Clock—“Well, I’ve got to be going, for I’ve got a twelve-mile drive and it’s bitter cold to-night. I pity the poor people who have no coal on a night like this.{169}{168}”

## A PICTORIAL SERMONETTE

On the Imaginative Man who works himself into a Passion because he thinks Some one may insult him

“I wonder if he will remember me after all these years. Maybe his prosperity has changed him so that he will pretend to forget the old school-days.”

“Well, if he tries the haughty act with me there’ll be trouble. I won’t allow any man to insult me. It would be an outrageous way to treat an old friend.”

“And I’m too proud to stand for it a minute! I’ll mop up the floor with him! I’ll show him that I’m as good as he is, even if he is rich. Confound him, I’ll leave this beastly hole rather than be humiliated that way!”

As a matter of fact Mr. Scadsworth was delighted to see his old friend.

As a matter of fact Mr. Scadsworth was delighted to see his old friend.

{171}{170}

## A PICTORIAL SERMONETTE

One of the Perils of those Whose Positions in Society are not Secure

Mr. Snobbly (aside)—“Great Scott, there’s that man who spoke to me at the hotel. I wonder how he broke in here. I hope he doesn’t speak to me right here before Mrs. Topnotcher.”

“Oh, Mrs. Topnotcher, what a beautiful tapestry that is over there!”

“And what a lovely chandelier you have.” (Aside.) “I hope that old man has not recognised me.”

As a matter of fact, old Mr. Bullion didn’t know Snobbly was on earth. He merely came over to speak to his old friend, Mrs. Topnotcher, with whom he spent a week at a house-party in Windsor Castle as the guest of King Edward.

{173}{172}

## MR. LUGUBRIOUS BLUE AND MR. SMILEY GLADD ON THE VENEZUELAN SITUATION

Mr. Gladd—“Well, I see there’s another little scrap down in Venezuela.”

Mr. Blue—“Little scrap, nothing. It’s the beginning of a terrible war between the United States and Europe.”

Mr. Gladd—“Oh, I think they’ll adjust the trouble before long.”

“Now, you mark my words. Inside of three months we’ll have to defend the Monroe Doctrine against England and Germany.”

Mr. Gladd—“Oh, dear me, you don’t think it’s so serious as all that, do you?”

“Listen. I’ll tell you just what will happen. England and Germany will fight Venezuela for a week or two, then demand eight hundred million dollars indemnity and refuse to leave till they get it. Uncle Sam’ll say, ‘clear out,’ and then look out for something doing in war circles.”

Mr. Gladd—“Oh, I’m sure they’ll patch it up all right.”

“Just you wait. We’ll have a war that will be the most dreadful one that ever happened.{175}{174}”

## A CARIBBEAN SCHÜTZENFEST

Or, the Ship that was much the Worse for War

“Ach, Himmel, this monotony is deadly. Nichts komme raus; or, in other words, there’s nothing doing in war circles.”

“While we’re waiting, let’s heave a few twelve-pounders over in that Venezuelan fort. Let’s wake ’em up a little.”

“By the way, gunner, see if you can shoot the mizzen-mast off of that mule over yonder.”

But at that moment the Venezuelans woke up, and the Schützenfest was all over.

{177}{176}

## SHERLOCK HOLMES ANALYZES A PERFECT STRANGER

Sherlock Holmes—“Ah, a stranger whom I’ve never seen before.”

“How do you do, sir. I observe that you are in the coal trust; also that you have just had a narrow escape; that you have no children; that you were in a great hurry this morning; that you have been writing, and that you shaved with your left hand this morning. Are you going away on the afternoon or the evening train?”

“Why, this is simply marvelous, Mr. Holmes. Everything you’ve said is true. How in the world did you find out all these things about a man you’ve never heard of before?”

“By a very simple process of deduction. I can tell by your hands that you are in a trust, and I know it was the coal trust by the hungry way you looked at my purse there on the table, and by the fact that you glanced apprehensively around you as if expecting some one to hit you with a club. I knew that you had just had a narrow escape, by the fact that three bricks grazed you, and the brick dust is still on your coat. You have no children, for if you had you would have some consideration for poor people who have children. I knew that you expected to take a journey, because I understand the grand jury is in session. I also knew that you had shaved with your left hand because your face is cut, and there is ink on your right forefinger, showing that you were writing out an order to whoop the price of coal while shaving with your left. You were in a hurry, because you had time to have only one shoe polished. It’s all very simple.{179}{178}”

## THE SYMPATHETIC COAL DEALER AND THE MAN WHO HAD TO HAVE A TON OF COAL

Sympathetic Coal Dealer—“I’m terrible sorry your family is suffering, but I haven’t an ounce of coal that isn’t contracted for.”

“Oh, it breaks my heart to hear that your children are suffering and if I had any coal to spare I’d let you have it.”

“Oh, your sad story overwhelms me with grief and I wish to express my deep sympathy.”

“I’ll send the coal right down. If you need any more just let me know.{181}{180}”

## DOES THE END JUSTIFY THE MEANNESS?

The Coal Operator—“Honestly, I hate to see all this suffering upon all sides—”

“But, Great Scott, just see how much money I’m making! I’ll soon have enough to endow a college.{183}{182}”

## THE COAL INVESTIGATION

The Chairman of the Committee to the Coal Conspirator—“Now, answer me explicitly. What per cent of hydrogen does the average ton of coal contain?”

“Now, do not attempt to equivocate or evade this important question. If a ton of coal weighs a thousand pounds, how much does a ton of anthracite coal weigh compared to the weight of a ton of bituminous coal?”

“Do you or do you not know whether a ton of anthracite coal dating from the paleozoic age burns more readily than a ton of bituminous dating from the pre-glacial epoch? This has an important bearing upon our investigation.”

The Committee submits its report.

{185}{184}

“ANARCHY ISLE”

Suggested by Senator Hoar

{187}{186}

## THERE IS NO CLAUSE IN THE NEW NICARAGUAN CANAL TREATY AGAINST BILLBOARDS

{189}{188}

“IN THE SPRING THE YOUNG MAN’S FANCIES LIGHTLY TURN TO THOUGHTS OF ST. JOE”

The Michigan “Gretna Green”

{191}{190}

## THE ARRIVAL OF THE INDIANA AUTHORS AND POETS

A Literary Event in Chicago

{193}{192}

## THE ANNUAL CRUISE OF THE DOROTHEA AND THE ILLINOIS NAVAL RESERVES

{195}{194}

## THE NATIONAL GOLF TOURNAMENT AT GLENVIEW

{197}{196}

## SOCIAL HAPPENINGS IN WASHINGTON, D. C.

The Tea and Punch Route on Connecticut Avenue during the Busy Hours

{199}{198}

## ONE RESULT OF THE MODERN METHODS OF THE UP-TO-DATE CHURCH

“John, I just know there’s somebody trying to get in our front door.” |  | “Now, do be careful when you open the door, John.”

“John, John, don’t open that door!” |  | “Gee! I didn’t know w’ere te toor-bell wass at.”

“Oh, John, I just know something dreadful has happened to father!” |  | “Gee! if dere hain’t no answer, I guess I’ll mosey back. Gee! dis is a peach of a night.”

{201} {200}

## GENERAL CHAFFEE AND VICE-GOVERNOR WRIGHT ARRIVE FROM THE PHILIPPINES

“Let us give them a Filipino welcome that will make them feel at home.{203}{202}”

## THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO FOOTBALL TEAM—

As Stagg describes the Condition of the Team before the Game—

As the Team really will be during the Game

{205}{204}

## THE POPULAR GIRL WHO WISHED OUT LOUD

“Oh, I should so dearly love to have a nice Boston terrier!”

December twenty-fifth

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